bts of bst #1

A man called me a skeezer online. I did not know what this word meant. I do now.

A man called me a skeezer on

The Pick and Roll

’s republishing of The Fallacy.

I did not know what this word meant. I suspected by his tone, though, it was most likely unflattering, and that was correct.

I was perturbed by the characterisation. I would consider myself someone with high morals and, at the least, average standards of cleanliness. 

I responded as any mature person on social media would. I called him a skeezer back.

Brad is the name of the skeezer-designator. He even specified my particular skeezer type: ungrateful.

Although the delivery could have been kinder¹, it was not a completely incorrect observation from Brad: I did not go overseas to college.

The Development Player essay has endured at least five different draftings. The version Brad read was the second time it had been publicly published, after originally being released here, and working with The Pick and Roll team marked at least another two rounds of edits.

Brad made me wish I could edit it again.

It would be an easy amendment: I never pursued offers of interest from American colleges because, by being selected as a DP in the WNBL, I was supposedly already on the way to becoming a professional basketballer. I did not need an NCAA scholarship. I could stay in Australia and use our pathway.

One small sentence! Further clarification! Specificity! It probably would not have stopped Brad and his vigorous posting of a comment, but it would have left him with little other than his misogyny and strange syntax. It would have at least dissolved his, or anyone’s, ability to utilise that reasoning — and, when you’re writing an article as potentially inflammatory as The Fallacy, the job is mostly one long exercise in preemptive rebuttal of hypothetical arguments.

Brad’s comment made me restless and dissatisfied. It was chafing; a sudden sense of incompleteness. I did not want to reply to Brad, I wanted to rectify the small cavity Brad had unwittingly pointed out in my piece.

A large part of being a writer is that impulse: to continuously revisit, revise, correct, distill, expand, improve.

Which leads me neatly to welcoming you to the first instalment of bts of bst.

Writing is a slow, sometimes secret, regularly lonely, process. It can feel, in phases, like being smothered — when pieces collect rejections; when they encounter an acceptance but the publication process is naturally protracted; when there is, ultimately, constantly, such limited artistic release. The amount of work being created is enormously disproportionate to the amount able to be shared.

I am often asked about my writing. I always struggle to find a succinct answer. There is sometimes a tiny bit of success. There is mostly a lot of failure.

I am interested in discussing all the failure now. It is tempting to wait for the protective gauze of accomplishment before I reveal all my defeats and deficiencies … but the gauze might never come! And ego is boring! Judge me with impunity now!

bts of bst is a summary: of recent rejections I have received, submissions I have made, art I have consumed and, most importantly, for bst full subscribers (love you) the title and synopsis of the next big work — and when you can expect it.

The schedule for those main pieces have been far less predictable than I would like — I am simultaneously trying to cut 90,000 words from a novel (sorry, Aviva) and learn a new sport (in other words: actually get a game) — but I appreciate your patience, and am so thankful for your support. The essays are coming. We will find a regular publication slot.

If you’re new here, hi. For everyone else, thanks for hanging around.

---

bts of bst #1

two failures

1. Received a rejection email from The Sun Magazine for a piece of creative nonfiction I submitted in November.

2. Received a rejection email from Overland for a piece of fiction entered into the 2024 Neilma Sidney Short Story Prize.

six submissions

1. Submitted a new piece of fiction about womanhood, science and violence to the Sorrento Prize.

2. Reworked a piece of fiction, after brilliant feedback from Julie Koh, about sport and rumours for the Peter Carey Short Story Award.

3. Rewrote a piece of fiction about children and parents, and submitted it to the Hope Prize.

4. Wrote a pitch for KYD about bodies, relationships and women athletes.

5. Submitted a piece of fiction to Russh for their literary showcase, and 6. a piece of nonfiction to its magazine.

two releases 

1. Saw the The Intricacy of Magpies, written more than seven years ago, nestled as a physical form in a Meanjin edition.

2. Worked with

   Damian Arsenis
   and
   Kein
   to publish a new edition of The Fallacy in their newsletter.

(Thank you,

Tim

,

Luuuc

, and everybody who has interacted with the piece publicly or messaged me privately. I have been overwhelmed by the generous level of engagement.)

eight pieces of art consumed

1. Read Americanah by

   Chimamanda
   Ngozi Adichie.

2. Read Love Match by

   Clare Fletcher
   .

3. Read (listened to) New Animal by Ella Baxter.

4. Witnessed the wedding of Katie Brennan and Olivia Christie in the rain.

5. Attended a skit in Las Vegas by a comedian called Ginger Billy — thought his humour was benevolent and intelligent for a considerable amount of the performance, then he started ‘joking’ about the genitalia of transgender people, and violence, and he became promptly unfunny.

6. Watched Circus Soleil (Mad Apple), also in Las Vegas, with Tessa Lavey and Isabel Huntington — the show single-handedly made up for Las Vegas. 

& ate fortune cookies at PF Chang’s afterwards.

7. Watched the Casey Demons verse Port Melbourne in the VFLW.

8. Started The Strays by Emily Bitto.

four reasons for gratitude 

1. Was followed on Instagram by Katerina Gibson, the author of internationally-acclaimed short story Fertile Soil. I was logically required to send this talented stranger a composed, dispassionate greeting — and Katerina replied she had not only read my writing but, with a double-mouthed smiling face, enjoyed it.

:))

2. Received beautiful, detailed feedback from

   Kerryn Mitchell
   in response to No Capital: How Much Does Change Really Cost? I will be politely asking her to share excerpts for the inaugural bst thread when I am finally brave enough to open it.

3. Had people as respected as Robyn Maher and Michele Timms (

   mtimms7academy
   ) respond with support of The Fallacy.

4. Saw a stream of new subscribers to bst (welcome!²) — was especially touched by those like

   Emma Simms
   who used their free read of my work in The Pick and Roll as a reason to tangibly support me, and have become a full subscriber. You all make this work possible. Thank you.

one recommendation

1. For Sara Blicavs, a professional athlete, business-owner and friend, who is currently recovering from back surgery. Her underwear brand is about to release a new range, including an increased number of sizes and styles. Find out when here.

one upcoming article

1. Finalising edits, with help from the inimitable Dean Andrews, for the next essay, A Numbers Game.

one quote

by Tarneen Onus Browne.

two organisations to support

1. OurWatch — a not-for-profit organisation dedicated to the prevention of violence against women and their children in Australia.

2. APAN — a national coalition harnessing the passion of Australians for Palestinian human rights, justice, and equality.

Until next time x

1. Bold of Brad to assume I think I am any good at all.

2. If you have not already taken the reader survey, take it! In a friendly, entirely unsinister way, I want to know all about you.

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Saraid Taylor trains and writes on sacred Wurundjeri country. She acknowledges Elders, past and present, and extends that respect to all First Nations peoples around the world. Ten percent of profit made from bysaraidtaylor subscriptions will be donated to Sisters Inside.